Tis the season...

So a few weeks ago, Ajay mentioned in passing that I am an idealist. I like things done the right way. I like the job done right. And sometimes the amount of effort I go through to accomplish my vision of a project, event, what have you, is astronomically higher than what it could be if I were more well adjusted and able to be okay with "OK".  But that spells slacker to you and me.

Today for example. I have one tree outside that I decorate each year. It has a dozen or so ornaments suited for outdoors, as well as  lights...simple white lights. Oh, and a beautiful gorgeous BIG brass Om symbol I got in Little India a fews years back, just to keep it real in my little haven.

So although the holidays got too busy and I never finished this post, here's a run down of how things went trying to hang a few for-the-love-of-baby-Jesus Christmas lights.

• got new lights bc one strand didn't work
• bought 2 instead of 1 just to be sure
• these have a hint of lavender instead of gold
• the front tree was already decorated with 2 strands of goldish lights
• The inside and most prominant tree was in need of one last strand.
• 4PM: realize lights don't match
• 4:01: decide we could make a stripe effect with gold/lavendar/gold lights on the indoor tree since outdoor tree is done.
• 4:45: have pulled all original lights off. Re-position new lights on tree every-other strand in order to get the "I meant to do this"effect. But I didn't mean to do it. And the tree screamed that.
• 5:00 Girls say I'm hungry. Lights everywhere. Some have stopped working. Amelie steps on one bulb shattering it
• 5:01:Make dinner...I have no plan...how about scrambleed eggs! With cheese! That's fun! Right?
• 5:15: Re-light in door tree with all lavendarish lights after pulling them violently from the outside tree.
• 5:20: Ajay walks in and says, hey! the tree looks nice.

Good he didn't notice the smoke coming from my ears....that would have been showing idealistic expectations!

Two little contractors

Amelie is 3.25

Amelie, sweet Amelie. All she wants is to be friends, make other people happy and included, and to be able to do whatever her sister does.

That's why at 3.25 years old, Amelie is taking evening Spanish lessons, swim lessons, and gymnastics in addition to 5 mornings a week at Montessori. She just wouldn't take no for an answer!

So, as I said, Amelie attends Montessori five mornings a week. She goes from 8:30 to noon, then returns home with me for lunch and a nap, which, I might add, is my favorite part of the day. I've taken to lying on the floor next to her toddler bed and listening as she fades off to sleep. This habit began when I noticed that the girls weren't napping at all during nap time, but instead playing and sometimes fighting the entire time. I put myself in the middle of their floor in hopes of being "A Cooler" and instead it became as much of an enjoyable part of my day as anything!

Amelie is extremely social. She is articulate beyond her 3 years. She loves being the baby of our family, but do NOT call her a baby. She's big. She will tell anyone who listens that she's big, she doesn't need any help on the potty, and never goes pee pee or poo poo in her pants. So there's that. Oh, and let's not forget her favorite pastime....drawing smiley faces!

In January, Amelie moved from the little bitty kids class to the pre-primary class at Montessori. She is currently the youngest student in her class, but she was ready for the change. Now she is exposed to so many new things in her short days there...yoga, music class, painting as much as she likes, art class, Spanish, tumbling...you get the idea. She's exhausted by the time noon rolls around!

Amelie is the definition of kind, gentle, and compassionate. She is empathetic beyond her years. I sometimes call her Little Maya (after her wonderfully social grandmother) because I notice a lot of times, the task at hand isn't the important thing to her, it's the connection with others during the task that she thrives on. Sure she could pay more attention in her gymnastics class, but then she'd miss out on making friends with each and every person in the room...including the teachers who are in love with her. Sure, she could probably swim as well as Alia, but she'd prefer to discuss things with her teachers. That said, that reminds me of something very different in Amelie versus Alia. She cannot be forced to do anything she doesn't want to do. Potty training, swimming, you name it. Anything that is challenging in the least bit, she will conquer on her own terms. You might as well save yourself the effort because when she's ready, she'll do it.

Amelie is growing up so fast. Although she's the youngest member of our family, it's amazing just how fast the first three years have gone. Watching her develop into a kind, thoughtful and hilarious little human being has been a real privilege.

Alia at 4.5

So what's our favorite four-and-a-half year old like these days?

Well, she goes to Montessori 5 days a week and has convinced me to let her stay until 3:00 with her little buddies three days a week. This means on those days she skips her nap in favor of playing with her pals at school. On Monday evenings we've started taking Spanish class at the community center. She is a confident, very outspoken student willing to participate at all times...even when it's some one else's turn.

Tuesday Alia comes home from Montessori for lunch and a nap, and then we go to swim lessons. She swims the entire distance of the pool on her own and now is learning to backstroke. While swim lessons were slow to take off for her, just as I was about to throw in the towel (lessons aren't cheap, and to be honest, the complaining was driving me nuts!) Alia began loving it. And her coach, Kyle.

Thursday is Alia's other short day at school, again so she can take a nap before going on to her gymnastics class. Alia is thriving in gymnastics. She is so excited to learn all the neat things her little body can do. She's obsessed with cartwheels, and to be honest, she's really improving. Now if we could just get those little legs to straighten out we'd be there. But for now, the mechanics of the cartwheel are definitely improving. And dive rolls. And straddle rolls. And the trampoline. And the beam. This girl loves gymnastics.

Alia is learning to read and write. Her letters have evolved into uniform size. Gone are the serial-killer big and small letters mixed together with half of them backwards and looping down the right side of the paper. She loves to sound out words and write down the sounds she hears. She keeps her Hello Kitty notebook handy and loves to sit at her little table and practice. She is also becoming a good little colorer. When she focuses, she can stay in the lines.

Alia is also a happy little singer. She loves music class at school and keeps a decent tune! She is also learning the words to songs by listening. I'm shocked sometimes when a song comes on in the car and she sings along with every word correct.

Alia enjoys being the teachers' right hand girl at school. She still struggles socially in that she'd rather be with the adults than kids, and when she does play with kids her age, it's likely she will boss everyone around until they don't want to play anymore. But even that is improving. She has real friends now and plays well when it suits her. However, Alia is still our strong willed child and can make whatever she chooses a miserable experience.

Take this morning for example. From the get go, she was a miserable little grump. No, I wanted this kind of jelly on my toast, no, I didn't want raspberries, I wanted blueberries. I have, indeed, created a monster with over-attending to her every whim in her earlier years. Now it's my job to reel it back in and re-direct her brightness and energy and enthusiasm to good versus evil. Because when she's having a particularly evil day, it's enough to drive me insane. Not only can she be an entitlement minded little prima donna, but she can be downright mean to her sister. She's bright enough to lure her in, and then rejects her, or changes the rules, or does something that absolutely devastates Amelie. Nothing breaks my heart faster than seeing these two little girls I love more than life itself sad or hurt. And Alia hurts Amelie's feelings a lot. It's as if Alia holds Amelie responsible for her existence and all Amelie wants is to be loved by her sister, her hero, her idol.

But hey, no one said this would be easy. There is so much good and promise in Alia. Her smile lights up the room. Her self-confidence is lovely. Now if we could just manage to get a little bit of self-control and self-awareness into the mix we'd be on our way. And in the meantime, I'm doing my best to enjoy the good, push through the not so good, and give her as much love as she needs.

Amelie and Daddy play Olivia

The Big Finish

In the Villa

West Side of the Boot

Up to my old tricks!

Alia is 4 years old

On Saturday, my little Alia turned 4 years old.

That's right.
A bicycle with training wheels, lovely dresses, coloring books, writing work books, fancy barrettes were among her favorite gifts.

She is a girl becoming aware of things girly. She is articulate, funny, smart as a whip, moody, jealous, silly, sour, pushy, gentle, kind, affectionate, stubborn, single-minded, aware, unaware, beautiful. She is taller, leaner, physically very active. She swims like a mermaid, jumps like a kangaroo, and hops on one foot constantly. Alia loves traveling, visiting new places and places we've been before. She now has memories of our last-summer trip to Turkey and the trip to Napa in March, but she no longer remembers her solid year spent in Miss Cindy's class at Montessori from 8:30 to noon. She loves to be read to. She loves to practice writing letters and sounding out words. She loves jumping into the pool with the worlds biggest smile and swims right over to you. When she comes back up out of the water she gasps for air like she's in a mad panic while smiling ear to ear. Her smile lights up the room. Her interaction with others makes me so proud. She is very friendly with any other adults. Only kind of friendly with other kids. But sometimes very friendly with other kids. It's really hard to pinpoint who Alia is at the moment because she is ever-changing.

Alia loves food and is always up for finishing your dessert. She is also a helper. She loves to help. She loves baking, measuring, stirring, tasting. For that reason I've begun afternoon activities with the girls. Sometimes we make lemonade. Sometimes it's orange juice. They both love participating in food preparation...for Alia it's about the instant reward of tasting what she's created!


So yes. She is many things. She is becoming many things. But she is also not those things. She is challenging. She allows me glimpses of what she's capable of and gives me hope, then slams the metaphorical door on me and regresses.

Ahhhhh, four. So wonderful. So frustrating. So optimistic. So I-want-to-cry-a lot-some-days (me, not Alia...but also Alia too).

This year, Alia is attending several weeks of summer camp at Montessori, from 8:30 until noon. For the summer camp, all kids are together, including Amelie. I was a little nervous about this in the beginning because Alia can be rather rough with Amelie. But now, as the summer goes on, I see a budding interest in Alia's eyes. She is beginning to understand that Amelie might just be a fun little playmate. But then jealousy takes over and there goes that little moment!

Alia is aware of her lovely hair. She loves it braided, twisted, in pony tails, in headbands. She will sit still however long is necessary to do her hair nicely for school. She is also able to dress herself for school now. From underwear to buttons, if she has enough time and isn't rushed she can get herself all ready. Giving her enough time is always the challenge for me, considering I have two littles to get dressed and out the door. But we're learning!

So happy birthday, my dear little big Alia. You are the brightest smile in my world.