Sleep Envy

Last night, I was totally wiped out with sleep deprivation and Ajay tucked me in at 8:30. I slept and slept, and finally was awakened by the sound of Ajay bringing the baby to me at 1:00 a.m. Fair enough, I thought...even though our typical change of shift was at 3 a.m., he had in fact taken care of her for quite awhile while I enjoyed getting re-acquainted with the inside of my eyelids.

So just to keep track, I had 8:30 to 9-10-11-12-1...that's like, 5 and a half hours of sleep. Not bad!!!!

Anyway, around 1:15 a.m., Little Miss woke up. And she was wide awake. And unhappy. I fed her. I changed her. I sang her songs. I jiggled her. I told her stories. I checked her diaper again. I fed her a little more. I could not get her back to sleep. She was awake for the long haul. I continued into the night trying to calm her, comfort her, and help her go to sleep. But she wouldn't...she was awake and fussy until almost 6 in the morning.

In this stretch of time...from 1 a.m. to about 5:50 a.m., when she decided to finally go to sleep, I found myself doing sleep comparisons in my head like a score card. I know in the end it all evens out. I know that this is totally silly and infantile behavior. But dammit...Ajay got a four hour nap during the day, and now a totally uninterrupted night of sleep too! He had logged 4 + 5 hours of sleep in one day! That's 9 hours! I only got 5! How is this fair!!!! Why did my little girl decide to sleep on his shift and be awake on mine?

And that's about the time that I wheeled in Alia's bassinet into our bedroom, touched Ajay's leg, and told him "it's your turn". I climbed back in bed, slept 2  hours, and began my day with a new understanding for the need of a good under-eye concealer.